A DarkRoom…

The last couple of weeks I have been so distract-able.  Even the simplest things, such as blog posts have been a tremendous undertaking.  Some people call it writer’s block, but I think that you have to be really good to suffer from such a disease.  Or as Norman Mailer famously said:

“Writer’s block is only a failure of the ego.”

Or maybe it’s just desktop clutter.  Check this out… (if you click on the image, you get the rest of the message)

DarkRoom is a free download for those of us still hoping to create something using a PC.  Yikes!  The odds are already against us, though the economy is still in our favor.  So maybe give this little eye-easing and pleasing program a run.

It is available at they.misled.us. If it reminds you of your first computer; congratulations, we are getting old.  Apple IIC, anyone?

Something significant later…

As my friends know, I have been screwing around with becoming the next big thing because I am apparently leprous to people who are offering real jobs that reward employees with paychecks.  As pipe dreams go, mine are prolific; I’ve been using my enormous quantity of free time to write a story.  I bottomed out somewhere around December first.

I was having coffee with my friend Bob the other day.  Bob asked how my story was coming, and I answered truthfully.  Usually I lie about the story and tell everyone that it is flowing like Read the rest of this entry »

A Personal Blogger’s Lament

As years go, 2009 was one of them.  Not the worst, and no where close to my best year of life, my first, which consisted of drinking breast milk until I passed out and/or messed myself.  Fortunately I believe that I am not alone, and that pretty much the whole of society has lost their damn minds in the last two years.

About a year ago I launched Ream of Paper, with little more than a dream, and the belief that I am so darn interesting, (funny and good looking) who could avoid reading my glorious thoughts.  The answer was shocking.  Read the rest of this entry »

winner winner sushi dinner!

Been a while, my name is Ryan in case you’ve forgotten.  I hope you are doing well!  While I was away I won!  Yes, I completed a goal (my mom goes wild!).  I knocked out 50,005 words in the month of November, or as I have renamed it, MO-vember.  It has been a blast.  I’ve done so many things, I cannot wait to share them with you.  I’ve read some good books.  Seen some terrific movies.  Listened to some sad music.  Became a Lutheran (mom undoes her going wild thing).  My wife became a vegan and I lost 6 pounds.  I miss steak, and  I plan on eating one very soon.

This week is the first week of Advent.  I hope you are living in tense anticipation.  I’ll see you later in the week with more spiritually minded thoughts, but until then…

Get a good dietary laugh from eatingtheroad.wordpress.com.  The flow chart is hilarious.  You can buy one as a stocking stuffer for the health-impaired eater in your family.  Yes, I found this while protesting my wife’s food choices!

The narrator in my November Project is real arrogant guy.  I hate him so much I am tempted to rip him from my story altogether.  He pops in to deliver commentary that I have yet to expel from the pages.  Here’s what he said a couple of days ago.  Bear in mind this is his first-draft also…

“I walked the woods where Hosea Ames gathered his wood.  It was filled with vines that extended to high treetops and wove branches together.  The fabric of limbs and branches made of two otherwise unrelated trees, Read the rest of this entry »

Thank God Day 10 is over.  It was my neediest day on record; everything I did needed to be praised.  Every sentence and phrase was a junior varsity marching band on my desktop, so self-aware and full of pimples they almost forgot they were playing a fight song.  Even using the bathroom required reassurance, “You really hit the bowl that time, big guy!” I’d tell myself.

To top that off, yesterday I noticed that my friends in the fake world of social media are all masters of bumper sticker productivity and success; with the vulnerability of a horseshoe.  Read the rest of this entry »

I think the day after God made the sun, the third day, he woke up to it’s wooing the following morning and began forming the fish and the birds, resigning, “Back to the ol’ grind.”  It must have been a rough day, the fourth.  Fish, for all of their intricacies, look mostly like fish; and birds resemble other birds with slight variations.  I have this vivid onomatopoeia relationship with God, where I make him speak, Read the rest of this entry »